Envy!! That GREEN EYED MONSTER!!!
I sure didn't start out in life planning to live my life in bed. Thank God that the pump has relieved some of that, thus far. I can get up and do life. I still have to be so very careful though because the body is used to a certain amount of cortisol and cannot make any extra if I add "life" on top of normal life for me.
That is when I can crash and revisit my bed. :(
I am this type A person who likes to micro manage life, organize my house, go and do, and go and do, but no more can I go and do like I use to DO!
Watching the World
It is so hard to watch the rest of the world going here and there and showing it off on social media. It is my natural inclination to feel JEALOUS!!!
How come I can't go and do and show my life off? Well because I am in bed with a crash due to AI. I did something that was hardly close to as active, as many of my friends, but it dumped me.
God doesn't want me to be jealous. I need to be happy for others and grateful for what I have myself.
Yes that is what I tell my heart, but that GREEN EYED MONSTER rears up and says "Feel sorry for yourself Terry". "Hate the world for doing what you cannot".
NO TIME FOR SELF PITY
No it is the most unhealthy emotion possible. It takes you to the depths of depression and ruins your joy.
I have to work on this constantly. Talk to myself.
Terry be grateful you have eyes to see so that you can do your art.
Terry be grateful your legs work and you can get around easily.
Terry you are blessed with two hands that can type and create.
Your brain is phenomenal. You can remember, design in your mind, learn.
God has given me many blessings.
We can always find someone out there who has it better and someone who has it worse.
Praising God for everything
I have learned that God wants me to trust Him no matter what. He has a plan for me. No my life isn't want I want in every area, but if I don't stay grateful, for what I do have, I am going to miss out on alot of joy in life, that is not worth losing out on. It is not worth it to sink into self pity.
It is the season that as a country, we are giving thanks. But we should not think about being grateful only on this day. Every day should be a season to give thanks.
Praise and gratitude takes the Green Eyed Monster out of our lives and replaces it with a joy that is satisfaction. One that says, I trust you Lord no matter what, and I am going to live in joy and peace, and not allow envy into my heart.
Thank you Lord for keeping that away for me. I don't want to waste my life with that green eyed, ugly monster.